To eliminate fears, we must change our mental roles. First, define what must happen for you to feel successful and to feel like a failure, then create new definitions for what must happen for you to feel successful and to feel like a failure.

To remove fear of failure, decide you’re going to be free of this fear, get leverage, then interrupt your pattern using the “erasure technique.”

1. Get yourself into a strong, positive state and create a positive anchor.
2. Picture a big failure from your past and watch it happen as if it were on a movie screen.
3. With a smile, run the entire memory in reverse at high speed.
4. Now run it forward twice as fast to the end and stop.
5. Run it backward and forward repeatedly as fast as you can, each time making it more bizarre.
6. Now think about the painful memory. You should be smiling!

And finally, imagine having the success you want over and over again until it’s absolutely real for you and becomes a sense of certainty that is emotionally conditioned.

Up to date, I start to come up with a sense that when a human is able to follow this program or any other things so far, there actually doesn’t need too much skills or tools to deal with fear. Every day I am just trying to fight for my dream, and the success in my mind is “go all the way to fight for my dream”, the journey of this fighting is already a success, while the outcome most of the time will be success as well.

However, I still have some problem with the fear of rejection.

Here’s how to overcome fear of rejection.
1. Decide that you’re not going to allow it to control your life.
2. Get enough leverage to follow through: write down the cost of not overcoming this fear and the benefits of being free of it.
3. Create a new set of rules for what must happen for you to feel rejected.
4. Use the erasure technique to interrupt your old pattern.
5. Create a strong positive anchor, then fire it off as you imagine yourself being rejected.

I am actually thinking about the fear of rejection might due to our own high expectation on ourselves. Say, when we do anything, we always expect success. But as we all know, success and failure is just two sides of a coin. We cannot always see the success side, right? And I design some thoughts to make ourselves happy, that’s to first expect failure, and then:

1. Yeah, I got it. It’s failure. (When we see failure)

2. Oh, hardwork pays. I should always keep it this way. (When we see success.)

Through this way, the fear of rejection could be nowhere. But easier said than done. I should keep it consitently.

Jeff

21 Apr, 2008

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